Thursday 23 January 2014

Sunanda Pushkar - Some Qs & As

Top post on IndiBlogger.in, the community of Indian Bloggers


Sunanda Pushkar was a gutsy lady. She lived on her own terms. Her life-story shows that she was no stranger to ups and downs, having survived many tragedies in the past. Each time life served her a shock, she was ready like a shock-absorber and emerged stronger. 

I admired her all the more when I saw her life-story recently. Like most people, even I knew about her from the IPL news headlines, her marriage to the author & minister… and would never have known so much about her but for the Social Media episode followed by her unfortunate death last week.
Last Friday, I was totally shocked when I saw a tweet “RIP Sunanda Pushkar”. I was busy with my First Twitter Quiz As Curator & came to learn of the breaking-news late, that too from Twitter where the drama of accusations and counter-allegations had all begun some hours ago.

It was, and still is, hard to digest… Why would such a person with a zest for life, end her own life herself? 


But, speculations are rife… Autopsy report shows 27 tablets of Alprax have caused her death. They even looked for the absent ‘suicide note’. 

She certainly doesn’t deserve the unfair allegations/judgment or getting branded the way she presently is. As my Blogger-friend, Preethi commented, “She will be tossing and turning in her grave seeing all these comments.”

But, why was her life cut short so abruptly?  I feel she had access to confidential info... What was that secret that triggered her murder?

I always knew the autopsy reports would indicate drug-overdose/poisoning. However, I can never subscribe to the idea that she committed suicide because she was severely ‘unwell/depressed/suffering/jealous’. This is a murder-mystery where the whodunit is the moot question… Many agree that we’ll never get to know the answer…

Sunanda was not the average Indian woman. She was self-made and successful and a wealth-creator of crores of fortune. How many Indian women are that modern and go for a third-marriage? It takes guts to do what we wish to do. 


It takes courage to voice what we exactly feel in life & in Social Media. Social Media is a part of life now. In this fake world, everyone paints an ‘All Is Well’ picture, shoving everything under the carpet & putting skeletons in the cupboard, though the reality is starkly different. 

Sunanda Pushkar had the courage to ‘wash dirty linen in public’. Why would a wife speak about her partner in public? That’s when she has tried everything and feels that this is the last resort… No wife would exactly celebrate if her husband exchanged personal messages with another woman… As she exposed her husband and had an open spat, Sunanda was accused that she has “no respect for her marriage.”

This is not an image that the public wants to see. Indian women are expected to be docile and Patiwrata and shield their husband even if the latter happens to be a wife-beater, philanderer or has a mistress or even a second-wife, though that’s illegal! If the husband does indulge in extra-marital relations even if they happen to be of the ‘intellectual’ kind, it is the poor wife’s fault! People justify that the wife is not ‘good enough’ or is to be blamed for whatever the husband does, which is so unfair…

But, if the wife indulges in an ‘affair’, it’s sacrilege! Even if she is totally pure, still her character is suspected. In the Ramayana, Maryada Purshottam Lord Shri Ram had asked his wife, Devi Sita to prove her chastity by the Agni Pariksha. When Gods behave so, what can we say for the lesser mortals on Earth in the KalYug?!

But, it must be noted that Sunanda had sided up with her husband and trashed the other woman in the story, putting all the blame on the ‘Woh’ in the ‘Pati, Patni & Woh’ Twitter drama. Sunanda accused the ‘Woh’ for all her woes & for wrecking her marriage while opining that the other woman ‘stalked’ her husband and “Men are stupid anyways.”

But, Sunanda even countered her husband’s claim when he said that his Twitter account had been hacked. She stuck to the truth & owned up that she had leaked those BBM messages. She stressed that she never lies.

As per the statement released, Sunanda was very 'ill'. If yes, why was she shifted to the hotel instead of the hospital?

Why was she 'ill' in the first place?

I feel the BBM text-messages were as real as her invitations to the journalists. It is a pity that none of them heeded to her request to meet her at her Leela Hotel-room… 

In this News-Video, Rahul Kanwal speaks about Sunanda Pushkar.

Little Did She Know nor did anyone suspect that she’ll be no more the next day to narrate her story… 

Even if the Media/Police/public is all ears to hear her now, she cannot come to defend herself as has been silenced forever…

Who bruised & killed her? 
Why did Sunanda have to pay with her life? 
Being forthright, earnest and honest kills?


Will the truth triumph?
Will the guilty be brought to book for cutting short a beautiful life?
Will there be justice for Sunanda Pushkar?

Many questions remain unanswered…


This Post is not 'paid' or written under threat... All these are my own independent ideas & personal views from what I have seen and read in the past week...

33 comments:

  1. A very brave and heartfelt tribute to a very deserving lady.Great job.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for stopping by and sharing. I am deeply disturbed and just put my thoughts. Glad you appreciate.

      Delete
  2. Honest opinions reflect an honest person.
    So was She - in her saying and doing, and so are you - frankly putting forward your personal views. :)
    Sad is how her book of life was drawn to an early close. Sad is how turbulence in married life took its toll...

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    1. And I believe- it takes honesty to recognize honesty, Poonam. Thank you so much for such kind words :)
      Yes indeed. She could have starred in the rest of the chapters in her life's book...

      Delete
  3. a great tribute post to her. very well written, Anita.

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    1. Thanks Meera. She really deserved better. Sad about having to write tribute for such an ex-full-of-life person.

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  4. I appreciate your honesty, integrity and courage. To more like you. But please be careful! All the best.

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    1. Thanks for the recognition, support & concern.
      Life is short. Better to live it on our terms like Sunanda Pushkar.... but even that's risky...

      Delete
  5. A tribute from the Heart for one who lived life from the Heart. Thanks

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    1. Thanks for the heart comment.
      Welcome to my Blog. Do visit often :)

      Delete
  6. Good analysis Anita.
    I too feel she isn't the kind to commit suicide, at the same time I can't believe ST is the kind to commit a murder.
    Su must have panicked with all wrong things happening in her life. Her auto immune disease, a disease that has no known cure must have frightened her and ST's mail exchanges must have made her insecure. I feel she took the overdose without knowing the consequences.

    I may be wrong but till something concrete comes up I cannot believe otherwise.

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    1. Thanks Indrani.
      I had to share my anguish and chose this way through my Blog.
      If contrary to her never-give-up nature she did take the overdose herself, then how can the bruises on her body be explained?
      There's the mystery.
      Hope there's fair investigation in which Satyameva Jayate and she gets justice.

      Delete
  7. That was quite a Tribute Anita...
    It is sad that a love story which was celebrated by the media has seen such a sad end.
    Let us all hope she finds justice.
    I don't know why..but I don't trust politicians.

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    1. Thanks Preethi. I have quoted you in my Post. Hope you saw that.
      May SP find justice.
      We never know whom to trust...

      Delete
  8. Great tribute to the lady. She was one of the biggest female entrepreneurs.

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    1. Thanks. Truly Maniparna, Sunanda Pushkar had an illustrious career.

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  9. Very frankly written on a topic abt which none is tlkin n voices r being silenced.v in india HV short memory n see n read abt so much violence each day that we HV bcom thick skinned.in fact,everywhr women r supposed to b shock absorbers n defend deir hubbies even if dey betray trust-hillary Clinton is most famous case.
    Hope Sunanda,a self made person for her every crore who WS unfairly subject to opposition taunts will b given justice fr she definitely did not deserve such a death.



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    1. Thanks Amrita.
      Being honest has its own repercussions. Yes, voices are being silenced.
      I was more concerned about Indian women & what attitudes, pressures and beliefs they have to succumb to... But, by presenting the Hillary Clinton example, you reminded that discretion, sacrifice & all qualities naive & nice are 'expected' from women around the world... Men have it easy.
      Just hope a fair trial is done and the guilty are held soon. It's been a week already.
      May Sunanda's soul find peace...

      Delete
  10. A loyal post.! Its sad how our country is shaping out to be!

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    1. Thanks Preeti. That's true. Mysteries are many...

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  11. A beautiful soul gone too soon :(
    Anita, good use of the prompt :)

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    1. True Aayesha that she was a beautiful soul whom we lost...
      Thanks.

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  12. A heart warming..heart felt tribute indeed Anita!
    Loved your honest opinions & straight forward words.
    May her soul Rest In Peace.

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    1. Thanks Nikhil. Wrote it as have been very shocked since last week...
      Nice that you liked.
      May she find peace wherever she is

      Delete
  13. Sunanda's tragic end was unsettling. I think her illness as well as the turmoil in the personal life conspired together to take her life. Was it suicide? An accident? I can't say. I only hope it wasn't a murder.

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    1. Sir, No matter what the reality, the fact is that we have lost her...
      The question is- Will we get to know the reality?
      So many bruises on her body and her sudden death a few hours after the Twitter episode make me suspect foul play. Do hope the investigations are fairly carried out & there's justice for Sunanda Pushkar.

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  14. I admire Sunanda Pushkar a lot for her honesty, class and courage. Hope light is shed on her death, though I shall refrain to criticize Dr Tharoor or Mehr, for that matter. Not just a self made woman but was charm personified. When she died, wrote something on her.

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    1. Yes, Vishal. I share the same views about Sunanda Pushkar.
      However, all the people associated in this case like Dr Tharoor & Mehr are innocent till proven guilty.
      Hope the true killers are nabbed & punished.
      Sunanda deserves justice.

      Delete
  15. No misdeed should go unpunished .. A very courageous article on a lady well deserving.
    To me she symbolised grit,brain, a passion for life, zing and sunshine .. RIP Sunanda Pushkar .

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    1. Truly Kokila. I agree.
      Hope she gets justice.

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  16. Read this if you haven't. A brilliant interview by Shoma:)
    http://www.tehelka.com/the-parable-of-the-vamp/

    ReplyDelete

Your words mean a lot to me.

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